To Tow or Not to Tow; That is the Question

Perhaps you recall that this year’s excursion began on the trusty BMW GS Adventure bike. After a cool, wet few days in Kentucky, we returned home to tend to a plumbing leak. It was then we decided to resume our odyssey in the Mazda Miata. After 1/4 million miles of motorcycle travel over the past six years, we feel like we understand bike travel and many challenges that may confront you. Fortunately, they have been few, thus far. Other than a couple bruises from hail and a fractured ego from falling down in the mud, our travels have been predominantly blissful. Both Liz and I agree motorcycle travel is truly the best way to see this great country. Our recent 70 plus days inside a 4-wheeler (Mazda then Jeep) was like going back in a time capsule. There was a certain allure from the degree of comfort and luxury that couldn’t be denied. However, there were many occasions when we missed one or both of the bikes. We chatted about future travel plans beginning with this one, Steamboat Springs. I mean…what’s not to love about a Jeep trip to Colorado? But…what about our beloved bikes? Nothing is worse than being an awesome road bike sitting home alone in a hot garage. No telling what they do and say to one another while we’re away. Then, like a bolt out of the blue, it hit us; we’ll trailer a bike when next we travel. Thus, we’ll have the best of all worlds. Sounds perfect; doesn’t it?

Off I go into the wild, blue yonder, i. e. the World Wide Web! It’s time for a crash course in trailering shit behind a Jeep. Oh no!! You can’t be serious?! Don’t tell me that a 2-door, short wheelbase Jeep is not the perfect tractor for almost any trailer. Well, folks, it just ain’t. Unless you plan to pull light loads for short distances on flat terrain, Jeeps shouldn’t be your first vehicle of choice. Now that may seem strange since…well…they’re the Arnold Schwartzenegger of vehicles…right??!! Well, wrong. Yes, they’re rugged. Yes, they’re durable. Yes, they’re flexible and can climb up the side of the Empire State Building. But, they’re also, heavy, short wheelbase, high center of gravity, and not generally designed for anything more than light towing. Well…a motorcycle is light…am I right?

Long story short, after hours on the Jeep forums, we decide to take the plunge. First stop is to Amazon.com for a mighty hitch and wiring harness. Next stop, U-Haul for a drop down and two-ball package. After all, with this raised monster, it has to get down to business with a  lowly trailer, dontchasee. Some highway-worthy headlights of the LED variety were in order as well. Liz and I installed all the above and groaned with pride.

JL Speaker LED Headlamps - Installation...yours truly.

Get down...get down!!

But wait!!! We’ve still have no trailer! OMG!!! But, if we had one, where would it live? It certainly can’t inhabit the garage with the Jeep and two massive road bikes. So, I write/call my buddy Charlie. He has one of those Harbor Freight fold up trailers that can actually inhabit a garage without demanding too much real estate. If he’ll rent or loan me his, I might just decide to get one of our own. This would afford us with the perfect test allowing us to dip just one toe into the pool of trailer travel adventure. 

Even though Charlie spent two hours assembling his masterpiece while I mostly watched from the sidelines, we took a pass on using someone else’s rig. We felt really bad imposing upon gracious Charlie, but elected to test the waters with just the risk to our own bike and trailer veterans, U-Haul. If we lose it all going up the side of a mountain pass, we have only ourselves at risk. Thanks again, most gracious Charlie!

Jeep forums are like biker forums. Contributors range from swarthy, know-it-all egoists to naive, inquisitive nerds like me. Thus, I never expose myself to cyber-slander by posing a question of my own. Rather, I’m an eavesdropper. Believe me, when it comes to trailering with a Jeep, it a voyeur’s paradise. About the time you conclude that Jeep trailer towing is a death sentence, Bruce Big Balls boasts that his Jeep once towed two fully loaded FedEx trucks coast to coast; piece o cake!! Then, Nervous Ned interjected that his 2016 JK went into “limp-mode” while ascending to the Eisenhower Tunnel on I-70, my exact route to Steamboat Springs. Who do you trust? How can there be such conflicting information on the Internet, the newly proclaimed bastion of truth omnipotent? What do you do if you’re Lenny…half man, half worried wimp? In my infinite wisdom I concluded that: no guts…nothing to blog about. We’re going for it! Colorado, here we come, Jeep, BMW, trailer and all!!